Be sure to follow the circle to read about everyone’s weeks, starting with my dear friend, Lynzi Berg.
Do you Time Hop? Every day, I open up that darn TimeHop app to see what happened on this day last year, 2 years ago and so on. Sometimes a post will appear that takes my breath away. I blame TimeHop for this week’s lack of photos. I read this post and I just can’t focus on anything other than the gratitude I feel for where my life has come in two years.
We had just gone through a birthfather contested adoption and the grief was the most I have ever felt or knew I could feel. I remember the alternating days of hopelessness and then prayer and faith. I would wonder if our adoption journey would ever be over, and then I would refocus and know that there was a plan that I just wasn’t in on yet. I knew something had to be on the horizon for us, but I admit that there were days that it felt unbearable.
If I had known then what I know now. I mean! The sun that was just around the corner!
This is a common view for me, looking on as my two kids talk and laugh and bond. I wonder if they realize now how lucky they are, how lucky to have been part of the miracles that brought them together. And then I feel like they DO know, and then that breaks my heart a little because that means they recognize that they have both experienced heartache and loss on their way to becoming siblings. They argue sometimes, yell just to get one another in trouble, engage in those normal sibling pickings, but they are always aware of that line. They don’t ever intentionally cross the hurtful line, stopping any teasing or roughhousing if the other appears visibly upset. I think they realize that they are strong people, but that this strength was built by the bittersweet events that often accompany adoption stories. I don’t think they feel like the other one will break, but I don’t think they want to find out.
I often picture them as adults, sitting in a coffee shop like this or supporting one another through life’s adult trials. My heart swells at the thought of their lifelong bond. The growth of their relationship from tearful bus stop goodbyes, cuddles after nightmares, and sharing the last cookie to bridal parties, long distance phone calls and shoulders to cry on at funerals. It’s one of those emotions that I don’t quite know what to do with because if I feel it as big as it is, I might just explode right open, it moves me so. It’s what I’ve always wanted for my kids, even before I could have ever predicted who my kids would be.
So, that’s it. That’s all I have this week. I can’t get past this story, the most important story of my life – building our family. A story of loss and love and faith and a very happy ending.
Be sure to follow the circle to read about everyone’s weeks, starting with my dear friend Lynzi Berg.